MARRIAGE TO NON MUSLIMS.
Can a Muslim man get married with a Catholic girl in the Church? And what about taking a children to the churches if they ask there mom to go with her?
"Do not marry unbelieving women (idolaters), until they believe: A slave woman who believes is better than an unbelieving woman, even though she allures you. Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: A man slave who believes is better than an unbeliever, even though he allures you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the Fire. But Allah beckons by His Grace to the Garden (of Bliss) and forgiveness, and makes His Signs clear to mankind: That they may celebrate His praise. " (Al-Baqarah 2:221)
Abu Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him quotes the Prophet, peace
and blessings be upon him, as saying, "A
woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status,
her beauty, and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman;
(otherwise) you will be a loser."
(Reported by Al-Bukhari)
The questions of common language, background, education and age, etc.,
are meant, in an ordinary stable context, to maximize the chances of
success and stability in a very important Islamic institution, that of
marriage. However, considering the particular position of Muslim
communities living in minority situations, young Muslims, male and
female, are exposed to all sorts of challenges - be they cultural,
linguistic, racial or social.
The Qur'an says:
"...And the food of those who were given the Scripture (before
you) is permitted to you and your food is permitted to them. And (lawful
to you in marriage are) chaste women from the Believers and chaste women
from those who were given the Scripture before you, when you give them
their due cowers, desiring chastity, not lewdness or secret
(Al-Ma'idah 5: 5)
children to the churches”, it starts a problem I his/her mind, whether
going to mosque with you and church with mom, both are right or wrong.
So with this brought up, if they become undecided for Islam then you are
responsible. If women does not convert to Islam early then you will be
responsible for children brought up on the day of judgement.
If a Non-Muslim man marries a Muslim woman what are the implications?
In Islam, marriage is a solemn contract for which the Shari`ah lays down
rules and arrangements to guarantee its stability. Islam's main focus is
on building a stable marital life.
I am a practicing Muslim woman ( 20 years old). I have moved to XXX 5 years ago. My parents were never practicing Muslims, but I’ve been thought about Islam from my grandmother. I have always been a believer in Allah. Until recently I did not know how to perform prayers, however I decided that there is nobody here to teach me so I had to do it myself.
With the help of Allah I learned how to perform them, also I started wearing hijab. The problem I am writing with is that I've been seeing this guy with whom I feel in love with. Unfortunately he is not a Muslim, but also he does not belong in any faith. He does believe in God. I have been trying to convince him to join Islam and become part of the only true religion, otherwise I cannot marry him. (we have been together for 3 years).
What I cannot convince him is that Muhammad ( pbuh) is the messenger of Allah. He keeps asking me questions like " How do you know that this is a word of God? What if Muhammad just made it up as if it is a word from God? Please tell me how to convince him that Qur'an is a true word from none other but Allah and that Muhammad is the Messenger.
Please help, he keeps saying that if we were to get married he would not have a problem with me continuing to practice my religion. He is quite proud of me for starting to wear hijab in society where it is not common. (I might be one of the only people wearing hijab in this town, the belief in Allah gave me the strength to do it). I know that he would not have a problem with me practicing my faith, but I would still like him to be a Muslim. Even though he is a great person and does not do anything bad. It really hurts when I think that we cannot be together.
Is it a major sin for me to get married to him? There are a lot of people who do it. Especially when there is no Muslims around where I alive at all. There are a lot of Muslim women that do it. Would I be terribly punished if I were to do marry him?
Answer: Praise be to Allah.
Praise be to Allah Who has made good dear to you; we ask Him to increase you in guidance and faith, and to guide your parents to practice Islam and adhere to its rulings.
First Part of Question
With regard to the Qur’an and the proof that it is the word of Allah, these are specious arguments which were put forward out of stubbornness and arrogance by the first kaafirs to whom the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was sent. Allah refuted what they said in many ways, proving their words to be false and pointing out what was wrong with it. For example:
1– This Qur’an is challenge from Allah to mankind and the jinn to produce anything like it, but they were unable to. Then He challenged them to produce only ten soorahs like it, and they were unable to. Then He challenged them to produce something like the shortest soorah in the Qur’aan, and they could not do it, even though those who were being challenged were the most eloquent and well-spoken of mankind, and the Qur’aan was revealed in their language.
Yet despite that they stated that they were completely incapable of doing that. This challenge has remained down throughout history, but not one person has been able to produce anything like it. If this were the word of a human being, some people would have been able to produce something like it or close to it. There is a great deal of evidence for this challenge in the Qur’aan, for example, the aayah (interpretation of the meaning):
“Say: “If the mankind and the jinn were together to produce the like of this Qur’an, they could not produce the like thereof, even if they helped one another” [Al-Israa’ 17:88]
Allah says, challenging them to produce just ten soorahs:
“Or they say, ‘He (Prophet Muhammad) forged it (the Qur’aan).’ Say: ‘Bring you then ten forged Soorah (chapters) like unto it, and call whomsoever you can, other than Allah (to your help), if you speak the truth!” [Hood 11:13 – interpretation of the meaning]
Allah says, challenging them to produce just one soorah:
“And if you (Arab pagans, Jews, and Christians) are in doubt concerning that which We have sent down (i.e. the Qur’aan) to Our slave (Muhammad), then produce a Soorah (chapter) of the like thereof and call your witnesses (supporters and helpers) besides Allah, if you are truthful” [Al-Baqarah 2:23 – interpretation of the meaning]
2– No matter how much knowledge and understanding mankind attains, they will still inevitably make mistakes, forget things or fall short. If the Qur’an were not the word of Allah, there would be some contradictions and shortcomings in it, as Allah says:
“Had it been from other than Allah, they would surely, have found therein many a contradiction” [An-Nisa’4:82]
But it is free from any shortcoming, error or contradiction; indeed, all of it is wisdom, mercy and justice. Whoever thinks that there is any contradiction in it, that is because of his diseased thinking and mistaken understanding; if he refers to the scholars they will explain to him what is correct and clear up the confusion for him, as Allah says:
“Verily, those who disbelieved in the Reminder (i.e. the Qur’an) when it came to them (shall receive the punishment). And verily, it is an honourable well‑fortified respected Book (because it is Allah’s Speech, and He has protected it from corruption). (41) Falsehood cannot come to it from before it or behind it, (it is) sent down by the All‑Wise, Worthy of all praise (Allah)” [Fussilat 41:41-42 – interpretation of the meaning]
3 – Allah has guaranteed to preserve this Qur’an, and He says:
Verily, We, it is We Who have sent down the Dhikr (i.e. the Qur’an) and surely, We will guard it (from corruption)” [Al-Hijr 15:9 – interpretation of the meaning]
Every letter of it was transmitted by thousands from thousands down throughout history, and not one letter of it was altered. If any person tried to alter anything in it, or add something or take something away, then he would be exposed straight away, because Allah is the One Who has guaranteed to preserve the Qur’an, unlike the case with other divinely-revealed Books which Allah revealed to the people of a particular Prophet only, and not to all of mankind, so He did not guarantee to preserve them, rather He delegated their preservation to the followers of the Prophets. But they did not preserve them, rather they introduced alterations and changes which distorted most of the meanings.
The Qur’aan, on the other hand, was revealed by Allah to all of mankind until the end of time, because the Message of Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) is the final message, so the Qur’aan is preserved in men’s hearts and in written form, as is proven by the events of history. How many people have tried to change the aayahs of the Qur’an and deceive the Muslims, but they were quickly exposed and their falsehood was discovered, even by Muslim children.
Another of the definitive signs that this Qur’an was not produced by the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) but that it came revealed by Allah to him is the following:
4 – The great miracles which the Qur’an contains of legislation, rulings, stories and beliefs, which could not be produced by any created being no matter how great his intelligence and level of understanding. No matter how hard people try to promulgate laws to regulate their lives, they can never succeed so long as they are far away from the teachings of the Qur’aan; the further away they are, the greater their rate of failure. This is something that has been proven by the kuffaar themselves.
5 – Reports of matters of the unseen, both past and future, which no human being could speak of independently, no matter how great his knowledge, especially at that time which is regarded as primitive in terms of technology and modern tools. There are many things which had not been discovered yet, and which have only been discovered after lengthy and difficult exploration with the most modern equipment, but Allah told us about them in the Qur’aan, and the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) mentioned them, fifteen centuries ago, such as the stages of embryonic development, the nature of the oceans, etc. These things have made some kaafirs state that this could only have come from God, as in the case of the development of the embryo:
Only 60 years ago, researchers confirmed that man does not come into existence all at once, but rather he passes through stages of development one after another. Only 60 years ago, science discovered this one Qur’aanic fact.
Shaykh al-Zandaani said, we met an American professor, one of the greatest American scientists, whose name was Professor Marshall Johnson, and we told him that it says in the Qur’aan that man is created in stages. When he heard this, he was sitting down, but he stood up and said, “Stages?” We said, “That was in the seventh century CE! This Book came and said, man was created in stages.” He said, “That is impossible, impossible…” We told him, “Why do you say that? This Book says (interpretation of the meaning):
‘....He creates you in the wombs of your mothers, creation after creation in three veils of darkness....’ [Az-Zumar 39:6]
‘What is the matter with you, that [you fear not Allah (His punishment), and] you hope not for reward (from Allah or you believe not in His Oneness). (13) While He has created you in (different) stages’ [Nooh 71:13-14]
Then he sat back down on his chair and after a few moments he said, “There are only three possibilities.
The first is that Muhammad had a huge microscope through which he managed to study these things and he knew things that the people did not know, and he said these things.
The second is that this happened by accident, it was a coincidence.
The third is that he was a Messenger from God.” We said, “With regard to the first idea, that he had a microscope and other equipment, you know that a microscope needs lenses, and lenses need glass and technical expertise and other equipment. Some of this information can only be discovered with an electron microscope which needs electricity, and electricity needs knowledge which should have been acquired by an earlier generation.
It is not possible for this knowledge to have been acquired all at once in a single generation; the previous generation would have had to strive hard in developing science and transmitting it to the next generation, and so on. But for this to be the work of one man, with no one coming before him or after him, either in his own land or the neighbouring lands – for the Romans, Persians and Arabs were ignorant and had no such equipment – for one man to have all these instruments and tools which he did not pass on to anyone else… this is not possible.” He said, “That’s right, it would be very difficult.”
We said, “And for it to have been an accident or coincidence, what would you think if we said that the Qur’aan did not mention this fact only in one verse but in several verses, and that it did not refer to it in general terms but that it gave details of every stage, saying that in the first stage such and such happens, in the second stage such and such happens, in the third stage… and so on. Could that be a coincidence?” When we explained to him all the details of those stages, he said, “It is wrong to say that this is an accident! This is well-founded knowledge.” We said, “Then how do you explain it?” He said, “There is no explanation except that this is revelation from above!”
With regard to the many statements in the Qur’an concerning the sea, some of these facts were not discovered until very recently, and many of them are still unknown. For example, these facts were discovered after hundreds of marine stations had been set up, and after images had been taken by satellites. The one who said this was Professor Schroeder, one of the greatest oceanographers in West Germany. He used to say that if science advanced, religion would have to retreat. But when he heard the translation of the verses of the Qur’an, he was stunned and said, “These could not be the words of a human being.”
And Professor Dorjaro, a professor of oceanography, told us of the latest developments on science, when he heard the aayah:
“Or (the state of a disbeliever) is like the darkness in a vast deep sea, overwhelmed with waves topped by waves, topped by dark clouds, (layers of) darkness upon darkness: if a man stretches out his hand, he can hardly see it! And he for whom Allah has not appointed light, for him there is no light” [An-Noor 24:40– interpretation of the meaning]
He said, “In the past, man could not dive to a depth of more than twenty meters because he had no special equipment. But now we can dive to the bottom of the ocean, using modern equipment, and we find intense darkness at a depth of two hundred meters. The aayah says ‘a vast deep sea’. The discoveries in the depths of the sea give us an understanding of the aayah, “(layers of) darkness upon darkness”.
It is known that there are seven colours in the spectrum, including red, yellow, blue, green, orange, etc. When we dive down into the depths of the ocean, these colours disappear one after another, and the disappearance of each colour results in more darkness. Red disappears first, then orange, then yellow… the last colour to disappear is blue, at a depth of two hundred meters. Each colour that disappears adds to the darkness until it reaches total darkness.
With regard to the phrase “waves topped by waves”, it has been proven scientifically that there is a separation between the upper and lower parts of the ocean, and that this separation is filled with waves, as if there are waves on the edge of the dark, lower portion of the sea, which we do not see, and there are waves on the shores of the sea, which we do see. So it is as if there are waves above waves. This is a confirmed scientific fact, hence Professor Dorjaro said concerning these Qur’anic verses, that this cannot be human knowledge.
(See al-Adillah al-Maadiyyah ‘ala Wujood-Allah by Muhammad Mitwalli al-Sha’raawi)
And there are very many such examples
6 – In the Qur’an there are some aayahs which rebuke the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and mention some things to which Allah drew his attention. Some of them may have been embarrassing for the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). But if this Qur’an had come from the Messenger of Allah, there would have been no need for this; if he were to conceal any part of the Qur’an, he would have concealed some of these verses which contained rebukes or drew his attention to certain matters which he should not have done, such as the verse in which Allah says to His Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him):
“But you did hide in yourself (i.e. what Allah has already made known to you that He will give her to you in marriage) that which Allah will make manifest, you did fear the people (i.e., their saying that Muhammad married the divorced wife of his manumitted slave) whereas Allah had a better right that you should fear Him” [Al-Ahzaab 33:37]
After this, can there be any doubt left in the mind of any intelligent person that this Qur’an is the word of Allah, and that the Messenger (PBUH) conveyed that which was revealed to him in full?
Moreover, we tell this person, try it for yourself, read a sound translation of the Qur’an and use your mind to ponder these rules and regulations. There is no doubt that any intelligent person who has the power of discernment will see a great difference between these words (of Allah) and the words of any person on the face of the earth.
Second Part of Question
With regard to your relationship with this young man, this noble religion forbids women to mix with men for a great and wise reason. So you have to stop meeting him and break off your relationship with him until he becomes Muslim, in which case you can marry him in a proper Islamic marriage.
With regard to your love for him, this is a test from Allah – will you put your love of Allah before your love for one of His creation, or will you put your love for this person before the love of your almighty Lord Who has forbidden such things. Note that whoever gives up something for the sake of Allah, Allah will compensate him with something better than that, the first of which is that you will find, in sha Allah, that Allah will compensate you with comfort and tranquility in loving Him and striving to draw closer to Allah by means of that which He loves; so your love for your Lord and your attachment to Him will increase, and your attachment to all of His creation will become weaker.
With regard to the ruling on a Muslim woman marrying a kaafir man, this is haraam according to scholarly consensus; indeed it is one of the major immoral actions which Allah has forbidden in the Qur’an.
We advise you to be patient and to put up with difficulties, and to keep far away from everything that may cause you to do things that would anger your Lord. Note that Allah has made this world a place of trial and testing for His believing slaves; whoever is patient and refrains from following his desires, seeking the pleasure of Allah, Allah will compensate him with Paradise where He will bestow upon him all kinds of delight which cannot be compared with the fleeting worldly pleasures that he sacrificed. This is in addition to the happiness and tranquility that he will find in his heart when he obeys his Lord.
Perhaps if he sees how you adhere to your religion and avoid meeting him and sitting with him despite your love for him, he will come to realize the greatness of this religion which makes its followers prepared to sacrifice all that they love in order to please their Lord, and that they hope for a great reward from their Lord for their patience in obeying Him and keeping away from that which He has forbidden – and perhaps that will be the cause of his becoming Muslim.
A marriage was formed between a Muslim woman and a Hindu man. Neither of them changed faith. At present they have children. What faith should the children follow? How is that women to be buried after her death? If this marriage is not valid, what will happen to her children? Can they be considered legitimate at all?
That marriage is simply not valid from the Islamic point of view. The woman may be a Muslim but, by accepting to be married to a Hindu, she has violated the teachings of Islam on marriage. She accepted to be wed to a man who is not lawful for her. Therefore, the marriage is null and void. In other words, her relationship with him is illegal.
As for the faith of her children, perhaps it is more pertinent to ask about her faith. The fact that she has gone ahead with this arrangement and has been maintaining it for several years, having become the mother of more than one child, suggests that she does not have much regard to Islamic teachings. Otherwise, she would have taken the necessary steps to determine whether her marriage would be legal or not.
Having failed to do so, and continued with this arrangement is a strong indication that she may not really care about what Islam says. Hence the question arises, whether she is truly a Muslim or not. I do not suggest that by marrying this man she is to be considered a disbeliever. I am only saying that she does not seem to care whether her marriage is valid or not. If a Muslim woman goes through the process of marriage with a non-Muslim, no matter what religion he follows, she remains a Muslim although her marriage is invalid.
Her relationship with her man is one of adultery, not marriage. Her children are illegitimate in the sense that they are born outside wedlock. However, they bear no blame for the actions of their parents. They should be considered Muslims if their mother is truly a Muslim. If it is doubtful that she will be helping them grow as Muslims, someone else from her family should meet that end. When she dies, she may be buried in a graveyard of Muslims, because her action does not constitute apostasy.
Our Dialogue ( Source : Arab News - Jeddah )
Qur’an permits a Muslim man to marry a lady from the Ahle Kitab, but the vice-versa is not true, why? Are these Non Muslim ladies, not Mushriks, can you clarify?
You are correct. It is mentioned in Surah Mahida, Ch. No. 5, Verse No. 5, that...
“This day are (all) good things made lawful for you. The food of those who have received the Scripture is lawful for you, and your food is lawful for them. And so are the virtuous women of the believers and the virtuous women of those who received the Scripture before you (lawful for you) when ye give them their marriage portions and live with them in honour, not in fornication, nor taking them as secret concubines….” (Al- Mahida 5:5),
Islam gives permission for a Muslim man, to marry a woman from the Ahle Kitab - why? Because, when a Christian or a Jewish lady, when she marries a Muslim man, the family of the husband, will not abuse or insult any of her Prophets - because in Islam, we believe in all the Prophets of the Jews and the Christians. The Prophets they believe in, we believe also. We both believe in Adam, in Noah, in David, in Moosa, and Isaa (May peace be upon them all). Because we believe in all of their Prophets, the lady, when she enters a Muslim family, she will not be ridiculed. But vice-versa, if a Muslim lady goes to a family of a Christian or a Jew, but natural, they do not believe in Prophet Muhammed (May peace be upon him), and she will be ridiculed. That is why, Islam gives permission for a Muslim man, to marry a girl from the Ahle Kitab, but the vice-versa is not true.
Coming to the second part of the question that - are not these Muslim women, Mushriks?’ Brother is referring to an Ayat of the Qur’an Shareef, of Surah Baqrah, Ch. No.2, Verse No. 221, which says :
“Do not marry unbelieving women (idolaters), until they believe: A slave woman who believes is better than an unbelieving woman, even though she allures you …”.
Means, even if the Queen of England, let her be the wealthiest lady, or a lady, be the most beautiful in the world, still, a Zhaduwali, a slave woman, who is a believer, is much better than the best lady of the world, if she is an unbeliever. And the Verse continues…
“Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: A man slave who believes is better than an unbeliever, even though he allures you. Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers untill they believe: A man slave who believes is better than an unbeliever, even though he allures you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the Fire. But Allah beckons by His Grace to the Garden (of bliss) and forgiveness …” (Al-Baqara 2:221)
Another Verse in the Qur’an tells you from Surah Maidah, Ch. No. 5, Verse No. 72, it says :
“They do blaspheme who say: "Allah is Christ the son of Mary." But said Christ: "O Children of Israel! worship Allah, my Lord and your Lord." Whoever joins other gods with Allah,- Allah will forbid him the garden, and the Fire will be his abode. There will for the wrong-doers be no one to help”.
From this Verse, we come to know, that all those who say… ‘Allah is Christ’, those who are saying… ‘Jesus Christ (peace be upon him), is God’…they are doing ‘Kufar’. And one Verse of the Qur’an, says... ‘You are allowed to marry these Kafirs.’ You will think, the Qur’an is contradicting itself - but as I told you, analyze the Qur’an, as a whole.
There is one more Verse in the Qur’an, in Surah Imran, Ch. No. 3, Verse No. 110, which says:
“Ye are the best of peoples, evolved for mankind, enjoining what is right, forbidding what is wrong, and believing in Allah. If only the People of the Book had faith, it were best for them: among them are some who have faith, but most of them are perverted transgressors”.
So Qur’an says... ‘You are allowed to marry the women from the Ahle Kitab, who are believers, who are Momins - who do not believe that… Jesus Christ (May peace be upon him), is God, or son of God - but who believe, that Jesus (May peace be upon him), is a messenger of God, and they believe in only one God.